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Wednesday, October 19, 2016

Reading through those helpless faces

It was almost 7 pm when I arrived from work yesterday. Mukkum Hang was with his father spending his whole day because he didn't get to daycare. Whenever I meet him after work he quickly runs to me on my way and grabs me on my hand. I scoop him up and he wraps my neck around. I forget
Photo Credit Facebook.
everything and just feel the greatest happiness and pleasure of life when his little finger picks my nose and kiss on my cheek.

He started our meeting in the same way as we do every day. I asked his father if he gave him the bath, he said Mukkum  had got some rashes that's why he didn't. I looked throughout my little one's  body and found big bumps on his head, neck and fingers. I disappointed with his father for not taking him to the hospital even after finding that truth. I forgot my tiredness and my appetite after I saw him that way.

I quickly changed and prepared a bottle of milk, some snacks and his diaper bags. I asked his father whether he would drop me or I should call the taxi. He agreed to drop us. While I  started to change Mukkum he told me, “ I am okay” that surprised me and thought he was taking his father's  side. I went to the emergency room with my little boy, but found several women with infants, toddlers and kids waiting their turn to the doctors. I read the several minds, several of their soul and pondered myself deep inside of motherhood. Every one of them had lost their hunger, they seemed restless, but devoted to the loved ones. I found a life of women after having kids is just a sacrifice of everything for the sake of their children.

My Mukkum gave me a hard time for a while. He didn't want to sit there patiently rather he jumped and sometimes wanted to bang over a little girl who was also there for treatment. He wanted to return back to home and pulled me up hanging on my hand, saying, " common Mumma lets go". I speak with him in Nepali as my purpose is to teach our language, but he has just started to talk a little bit and he learned by himself to speak English through watching TV and songs.

It was quite difficult to wait there for a long time, but I didn't have a choice except convincing my child to stay there. I sang  songs for him sometimes and let him watch my mobile for a while. Eventually, he met two little girls who were bit older than his age, started to play with them passing and throwing his ball. I had to put my eye on him frequently though he was playing there but got a little chance to read the faces of several mothers like me.

One woman came with a little boy around the age of seven to eight months. She was alone and her little one pushing the stroller. After she registered the name she was standing there holding her baby. In front of my eye, her baby fainted and the nurses helped her to get into the emergency room. I felt so sad for that situation, how miserable she was, she might have felt helpless. She could have family and friends, but here none of them have time to take care without  any big problems or predetermined schedule. Everyone is busy with the hustle and bustle. I haven't seen the people in the morning who are not in a rush. Some  preserve their time putting their makeup on the train and some keep on having their breakfast on the way. I feel like life is like a machine here in the United State.

I just kept on thinking that women and her child while my little boy was playing with other kids. I came to know that every woman's happiness is her child and every woman life goes away waiting for their children to be alright and making sure their development and progress. The faces of each woman with their kids in their laps were telling me the same story. Most of them were alone with their kids waiting for their turn. I could easily read that they have hidden many things, but their heart and thought were bigger than whoever normal people have. But I know  no matter how much we try to be strong and determined we women feel weak and helpless when our little ones get sick. That is my personal experience and I was searching the truth, whether it applies to all or only me reading the faces of all those who were seeking the treatment and wellness of their kids.

I tried to figure out by reading their face and discovered that there were in the same boat as me. Even they are strong and courageous women they feel sad and weak because of their women's temperament that has grown inside them. I prayed for that woman who rushed to the emergency with her child but might have transferred somewhere I couldn't see her back again. We were called by the doctor only around  10 pm and prescribed some medicine to Mukkum and let us go. I asked the doctor if they could provide some medicine as it was already late to go to the pharmacy, but he suggested we need to find the open pharmacy from any of the open stores.

After coming out of the store, I thought to walk pushing my boy in the stroller to the nearby pharmacy but that was already closed. I walked a bit more to reach Duane Reade  but that was also closed. I stopped the green taxi and asked him to stop 24 hours Walgreen that I had heard has changed its schedule but he assured me it would have opened.

I stepped out with my little boy as it was about 11 pm and said to the pharmacy I could just drop the prescription as I had a taxi waiting for me outside . Probably she felt for me finding with a little boy alone at night time,  she asked me to wait only for a few minutes. She prepared me real fast, but still my boy was running away making me chase him from back. I returned back to the taxi and apologized for being late. He looked nice and he said that's okay. He brought me to my address as per my direction and when I asked how much the charge was he told me less than the regular charges. I asked him why in his response he said he turned off the meter during my wait time. I thanked him for his generosity  and paid four dollar extra tips. It was about the midnight, my little boy fell asleep I remembered those faces once again and saluted those great souls who live their life for someone and felt proud for being a woman myself.