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A letter to my son
Dear Mukkum Hang,
Motherhood is a beautiful moment of life that I realized after you came to this world. I experienced the unconditional love that I had ever had in my life before. I felt more responsible myself and found the meaning of my life. More than me, your arrival in this world made you grandparents one of the happiest creatures of the world who enjoy the life fullest.
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| Mukkum Hang Limbu when he was 15 months old |
I learned the pain that I had to go through to deliver you on this earth. I came to know a woman is unique in this sense because a man can never have this opportunity of having this labor pain. I learned the lesson how difficult it was for my mom to carry me in her womb for nine months and the pain she went through without epidural during that time. I am the supporter of your every movement enjoying and watching your every milestone of your life. I knew the meaning of love and compassion because of you.
You are still too young to be apart from you to work. That's the reason I wanted to work only part time to make sure you will be fed by your mom, you will be changed by your mom and to make sure you are alright for everything. But opportunity knocked the door for the full-time job and I have become your full-time worker mom. I have my own dream along with growing you up and taking care you. I have other responsibilities as well, that's why I had to accept the opportunity that I was offered.
Sometimes, I feel guilty myself leaving you for 10 hours in a day, but I hope it will make you more independent since your early age. You will learn to be social with other children and you will be a strong and independent kid by yourself. You will also understand the love of your father that you will have during my absence. I am sure I will miss those moments of your childhood, but we have to follow the rule of nature and accept our circumstances to move forward.
You are so precious in my life, you are my inspiration while I find some disagreement with your father. I learned how to compromise because of you. I learned how a mother forgets to eat, sleep and even enjoys the sleepless night. You are my heart, you are my thought and everything in this life. All the pain and difficulties are healed because of you.
Mukkum Hang, you are growing rapidly and you will be a man one day. I have hoped you will be one of the smartest, intelligent, independent and respectful men of this world. We have to accept the uniqueness of being yourselves because we can't find the similarities with other people. We have to accept the rule of nature and flaws that we have. We have to try to make our life meaningful and as it is a life of only one time, we have to enjoy the fullest.
My blessing is always with you baby! When you become adult enough live your own life with your own dream. Choose your own way of living and learning which will make you happier than ever. I hope, your parents' opinion will not distract your dream and I wish you will be able to choose your own regardless of our choice.
I also expect from you, you will be the one who can respect your parents and understand the values of the human being. You will find the self-respect and dignity of your own to live the meaningful life. I wish you could find your soulmate when you will be grown up enough to be at that age. You will find the good reason of having a conjugal life and that will always be the best fit in your life. I will remain your mom and the love from your mom will be remained with you forever. I keep on caring you, loving you and supporting you until I am here in this physical world. Even after going away from this earth, my blessing and love will be always with you baby!
This letter will be one of the pathways when you will be enough to understand the world and values of yourself. You might get into difficulties, but I hope you won’t be hesitating and can fight with the difficulties with strong determination. This is my promise you will be the one as I have expected. I will be reminding you again.
Your loving Mom
Indira
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